Friends With Benefits

FWB Wants a Relationship


The dreadful day has arrived: my Friends With Benefits has breached the line of casual fun and wants to enter the realm of committed monogamy.

I should begin by highlighting her personality and describing her physical attributes. Hollie is a wonderful young woman, aged 27, that knows how to take care of herself and the man that she is with. She is a great Mother to a 2-year old girl and is working hard in a retail management role while living with her Mom. Although she does not have any college or university education, her aspirations to obtain postsecondary schooling as a single Mom do impress me. She is good with money, has a high sex drive, and listens when I ramble on – three qualities I desire in any type of relationship.

Unfortunately, there are a number of issues that I cannot ignore:

*She is thicker than what I find attractive. She stands at 5’4 but has extra weight across the tummy, legs, and ass. I am attracted and aroused by women of petite stature.

*She eats fast-food and microwave dishes 5+ times a week. This is a huge turn-off for me considering that I am in fit form right now. She seriously has a pizza addiction.

*She does not have a drivers licence. I will never be a chauffer for a girlfriend again.

*She is not physically active and has no motivation at this point to make improvements to her body.


The negative points outweigh all of her positives; I will not settle with a woman simply because she has a charming personality. I can’t even say out loud that her physical shape is the barrier to any LTR, as society now deems thicker women as normal and/or beautiful.

Now, the former me would have thought myself as an asshole for having these views and that I should “give this girl a chance”. Thanks to the introduction to Red Pill theory and the Manosphere, I do not have any guilt. Just because I’m having sex with her doesn’t mean I owe her anything more than the positive experiences we are currently enjoying.

It crushed me, but I was honest with her and told her the following: “I’m working on myself right now and my goals. If I start a relationship with you, I’ll put everything on hold to focus on you. I’m not able to do that”. She is an amazing young woman, but I’m not prepared to stop working on myself so I can cook proper meals for her, drive her to work when it rains, and force her into a gym routine.

When your FWB wants a relationship, consider what YOU actually want and communicate it accordingly. In all, it was an hour of painful delivery (think of it like going to the dentist) and then leave with your head held high.

Still not sure? Read this:



The last two days were not the greatest in terms of meeting any new women. The weather wasn’t on my side, but that can’t be an excuse. Plain and simple: I did not get out enough and did not create opportunity to meet new people.

So, I used my crutches to limp through the week. I have two fair FWBs that contact me once or twice a month, both of which coincidentally began texting me at the beginning of the week.

Brandee and Hollie are quite similar: they are ambitious, have outgoing personalities, dress appropriately, and drink responsibly. Both have a child, which helps relate and build trust, as I have my own young daughter. These two women also know the current issues in my life (and I know theirs) because we communicate well.

In terms of looks, both would be considered a 7, as they have pretty faces; the effects of child birth are, however, noticeable. Regardless, they are great girls that just need sexual attention after enduring endless hours of career and parenting responsibilities.

The best part of a FWB is not needing to work any “game” through text messaging. Once an actual friendship and mutual understanding is created, typical conversation can lead into sexting quite naturally.

As is the case in many sexual encounters, a “reason” to meet must be created. Brandee is coming to model her new bikinis for me and Hollie wants a relaxing evening with a movie.

In the end, Brandee was a no-show; I have stopped texting her and will wait until she makes contact. At that point in time, I will remind her of her flaky behaviour and demand something extra sexually (in a playful way). This isn’t like her, so I’ll let it go. Any other girl and the number would be deleted.

Hollie was able to make it. Dressed in comfy clothes, she came over for the movie. I never spend much money on a girl, so a bottle of wine and a box of chocolate is worth $20, especially when you lay it out casually and it doesn’t look like you’re trying hard. This is not White Knight behaviour…if she doesn’t drink/eat, she knows I’ll finish the bottle/box lol. In the end, we had some pretty awesome sex and I took her home at 3am.

In summary, I’ve been able to flirt with two girls that are great to have around. It is important to keep good people in your life and neither of these two are introducing problems at this point. I do need to meet new women, however, as Brandee will be outta my text messages for an indefinite period of time.

That’s my update. More to come